And we’re back with another College Confession all about taking the path or the route that isn’t the “normal” one to take, as you’ll read about in the confessions. But this time, we are focusing on gap year or gap semester submissions to see what it was like to take time off from school. Bare with me here because some of these submissions are a little longer than the last ones, and that’s intentional. I want people to really be able to understand what this experience may be like and to be able to potentially see themselves in the shoes of those who wrote them…So, here we go.
I would say the hardest part of deciding to take a gap semester was knowing that everyone else had it all figured out when I definitely didn’t. The end of my senior year was definitely rough for me. My future was super uncertain while all my friends began solidifying their college plans one after the other. On decision day, we had to decorate these little flags with our college plans. I remember being so embarrassed that I didn’t have a plan, and I ended up drawing the meme of that dog sitting in a chair while fire burns around him saying, “this is fine.” I really wish there was less stigma around not taking the traditional college route.
I feel for you and I say kudos to you for being the bigger person and taking an uncomfortable situation and changing it to where you are back on top. If it were me, I probably wouldn’t have even gone to school that day and seeing everyone else having it all figured out would’ve been the hardest part for me to deal with too. At my school we do college t-shirt day instead of decorating a flag with what college you are going to. I always wondered how it must feel for someone to show up to school and be bombarded with reminders that they didn’t get into their top school or maybe didn’t get in anywhere.
Don’t let the lack of normalization around taking a different route after high school keep you from feeling confident and proud of yourself.
I actually am in the unique position of being able to say that I not only transferred but also took a semester off of school. The college application process was pretty rough for me and I ended up getting rejected by a lot of my top schools. One of my schools, however, accepted me for the spring semester instead of the fall. After a month of deliberating, I decided to take up the offer - leaving my fall semester completely open. But, after I got to college in the second semester, I immediately knew that my school wasn’t right for me. It wasn’t that the school was so awful, there were just little things that I knew I wasn’t happy with. I decided to transfer probably within two weeks of getting to school. In that sense, my situation was pretty unique because most people wait a full year before transferring. This made the transfer application a little more difficult for me; I didn’t have any finished college courses so I had to submit a special circumstance letter so the admissions offices would know to not make a decision until the spring semester was finished.
To take a gap semester in the fall, get to your school in the spring and feel that it isn’t right and ultimately transfer to a different university ALL in the span of one year is a LOT to manage and process. To be able to do all of those things shows such a level of maturity and ability to handle tough situations.
But to wait an entire semester while seeing all your friends off at college, to then get there and not enjoy where you are is something I can’t even imagine feeling. But it’s so important to recognize and take that feeling of uncertainty, that gut feeling, and put it to work. Don’t stay somewhere you aren’t happy. It may take a few pit stops, but you will end up where you are supposed to be. Do not settle!
I definitely know a bunch of people who have transferred or taken a gap year and it’s definitely gotten more common and it’s pretty accepted, but it needs to be more normalized. When people find out that someone’s transferring or taking a gap year, the immediate response is “Why? What happened? Are they okay?” And yes, maybe sometimes something did happen that caused them to make this choice, but I think it needs to be more accepted that people can just make that choice because they aren’t ready for college yet or they just want to do something different and take time for themselves. My dad always tried to convince me to take a gap year and travel the world before going to college, and I always shut down the idea because I felt like I had to follow the path that everyone else seemed to follow.
The main takeaway here is that it needs to be normalized. Transferring or taking a gap year should be just as “normal” and typical as getting into college and staying there for four years. And for the last part, dads are always right. It’s annoying, and you’re not going to want to listen to your dad versus your friends, but they’re always right.
On taking a gap year, for me it was because I didn’t know what I wanted to do, what I wanted to major in, etc. and I signed up for a travel program. It pushed me way out of my comfort zone which made me grow as a person very quickly and makes you realize a lot of things about yourself and the world...obviously this sounds like the cliche but it is very true!
Whether it’s taking time off from school, delaying the start or transferring, all of those decisions are huge and mature ones that you have to make. It’s impossible for you NOT to grow up from them. There are adults out there who have probably never had to make a decision as difficult as those in their life. It can be scary to go to a new place without any idea of what you want to help guide yourself through it, so I see no problem in taking time off to travel and think about it some more. I’m always here for a good cliche - especially when they are true!
My father and brother both took PG years at boarding schools and they absolutely swore by it. It was hard for me to not do one after hearing their experiences with it, so I made the decision to do it. I actually wouldn’t look back on my PG year and highlight the athletic aspect of it. I loved my PG years because *** was an amazing place filled with such unique students and faculty. They were the ones that completely opened my eyes to a world where soccer wasn’t the one thing that mattered. I think this was a really important lesson to learn going into college because it allowed me to explore new things. Most people didn’t usually understand what a PG year was, but when I explained it to them most people said they wished they could’ve done one. I never took a pause from my education because I still took about 16 college level classes while at the boarding school. During that year I was able to indulge myself in a world that I never would’ve known if I never attended a boarding school. I would recommend this to anyone, because it’s truly a life-changing experience.
I know that I personally always thought that PG years were for people who wanted to pursue athletics in college. This submission made me realize that while that is often the case, the experience also helps open your eyes to see that there is more to life than sports. Whether you want to improve your grades or are just simply not ready to go off to college yet, this seems like a great option too. I think that taking a PG year is such a great thing. Having to board with people and having a campus makes it almost like a preview to college!
As senior year came along much too quickly, I felt really conflicted and different from my peers who all somehow decided where they wanted to go in middle school. After sending in my applications, although I felt a great weight was lifted from my shoulders, I still wasn’t sure about any of the schools I visited or which one was “the one” for me. For about a week I pondered the idea of taking a gap year and for some reason I thought it was this crazy thing that I was even nervous to talk to my parents about it...they were so cool about it...At the end of that week however, I ended up getting into what I thought was my “top school” and completely abandoned the idea of a gap year program. I got really caught up in the social aspects of being able to post on Facebook, buy the college merch and answer the question, “what college are you going to next year?” After being at that college for only one month, I hated everything and dropped out. I can only imagine what it would’ve been if I hadn’t been focused on the superficiality of senior year rather than actually planning on doing something that I would love.
Isn’t it a problem that we feel nervous to talk to our parents about doing what might be best for ourselves? I think that also depends on where you grow up and what is considered normal or the right thing to do. With that being said, it’s so important to stick to your gut feeling and put everything else aside. I know that all those things like college shirt day and being able to post out to the world where you are going to school are fun and feel rewarding. But, that is one day, one post that is relevant for about a day or two, and one sweatshirt. It’s so much easier said than done to put all those fun things aside just because I think we are scared of doing something out of the box. We either don’t want to miss out (FOMO) or are scared of what people will think. But. You know what is right for you. If you aren’t happy with your options, don’t force it. Take some time off to reevaluate the situation and create better ones for yourself.